Pregnant Dems Defiantly Down Tylenol
Can we maybe get a party-wide welfare check on the left?
If you need definitive, iron-clad, indisputable proof that Democrats are not okay, look no further than social media, where pregnant liberals are filming themselves popping Tylenol tablets like they’re Skittles at a slumber party. Not for a fever, not for a headache, but as some sort of political protest performance art simply because Trump (who’s just the messenger, for crying out loud!) announced the painkiller’s suspected link to autism.
The irony is, this isn’t even new information.
The histrionics on digital display isn’t casual kabuki theater, either; it’s full-blown mental illness, the same sort that plagues the scumlords who say they want to get knocked up just so they can have an abortion and the sad, misguided souls who post chipper “get ready with me” videos prior to their termination procedures.
Imagine hating a political party so much that you’d risk your unborn child’s health (or your own, if the former was the point) out of spite. Imagine being so desperate for likes, clicks, validation, or fifteen sorry minutes of internet fame that you’d turn your pregnancy into a TikTok highwire stunt. That’s not activism, that’s what happens when unhinged hostility takes the wheel and rational thought crawls into the trunk and passes out.
TRUMP: “Some people say it’s not a good idea to play hopscotch on the freeway.”
LIBERALS (launching themselves into rush hour traffic): “Oh, yeah? Watch me now, MAGA boy!”
Now we’ve got expectant mothers filming themselves gulping acetaminophen like it’s communion wine with captions declaring “the orange man is not my OB” and “I believe in science.” Sweetheart, science isn’t whatever the opposite of Trump says. Science is data, peer review, controlled studies. You don’t prove your superior intellect by playing pharmaceutical roulette with your fetus to rack up likes from strangers named @ResistanceQueen93. If you really want to stick it to Trump, plaster your car with I ❤️Nancy Pelosi stickers, stage a protest, write a scathing Substack post about his not-so-beautiful-hair—but please, don’t weaponize your uterus like it’s a Twitter dunk tank.
This morning, stories are rolling in that at least one pregnant woman has been hospitalized after intentionally overdosing on Tylenol. She’s allegedly in liver failure and on a ventilator and not expected to survive.
The analogies are endless. It would be like drinking battery acid because your ex told you not to. Like rage-quitting your dream job because your coworker got a better stapler. Like keying your own car because your MAGA hat-wearing brother-in-law bought the same make and model. There’s a difference between principled opposition and psychosis with a side of prenatal vitamins.
I’m not going to lie. My first thought when they announced the Tylenol-Autism connection was, oh boy, here comes the cover-up. Because anyone with half a neuron knows the Tylenol story only makes sense if you factor in vaccines. Tylenol is the cocktail garnish, not the main event. But then I read through the evidence, and—well—it turns out the garnish may be laced with poison, too.
There’s a ton of research out there that even deranged Democrats could easily find using a simple Google search—so they either don’t want to find it, they’re too dumb to look for it, or their unchecked fury kicked any hopeful shred of common sense to the curb.
Much of the science on acetaminophen in children (as opposed to during pregnancy) comes courtesy of Dr. William Parker, the immunologist Big Pharma loves to hate. He’s been screaming into the institutional void for years that acetaminophen damages developing brains—especially in boys—while the medical establishment told him to take a seat and stop killing their “safe and effective” buzz. His lab at Duke? Shut down. The fact that this happened after he began studying autism (and there were reportedly two J&J executives on the Duke board)? Surely just a coincidence. Journals rejecting his papers? Hey, “formatting errors” are serious business. The $10+ billion global market for acetaminophen? Nothing to see here.
The data, though? Yikes. Mice dosed with baby-equivalent Tylenol lost the ability to navigate a simple maze. (Imagine giving your toddler Tylenol for teething pain, and they end up unable to find the bathroom in their own house.) A 2008 parent survey study reported that children given acetaminophen after the MMR vaccine were several times more likely to be diagnosed with autism. In a subgroup of children with post-vaccination side effects, the increase was eight-fold; ibuprofen use showed no such association. An eight-fold increase! That’s not a “signal.” That’s a naked lady with a neon sign screaming, “Hey geniuses, look over here!”
It’s not just autism that’s been linked to prenatal use of America’s Painkiller™. ADHD, language delays, behavioral problems, asthma, and lower IQ are all associated with acetaminophen use in pregnancy. To be clear, these are observational studies—which can suggest but cannot prove causality—and experts are quick to point out that risks increase with prolonged or repeated use, as opposed to the occasional, modest dose.
And yet, even Tylenol says you shouldn’t take Tylenol when you’re pregnant.
Doctors, including ones who actually deliver babies for a living, are begging these women to stop. (Except this one viral psychopath, who is reportedly an MD working in reproductive endocrinology and infertility when she’s not busy posting pregnant Tylenol-pounding videos online). They’re pointing out the obvious: Tylenol can be useful prenatally when it’s needed—to control an extremely high fever, for example, which can harm the baby. (The general guidance: The smallest dose for the shortest duration as infrequently as possible. But it’s fine! Really!) But taking it for the sole purpose of telling the Trump administration to go pound sand? That’s not girlboss energy, that’s Darwin Awards material.
Sure, maybe Trump isn’t the person you turn to for nuanced medical guidance. But if your response is to prove him wrong by swallowing meds you don’t need while growing a tiny human, you might want to ask yourself: who’s really unfit to be giving health advice here? Because it looks less like “I believe in science” and more like “I’ll light myself on fire if it means he gets singed.” That’s not resistance, that’s straight-up self-sabotage. And tragically, it’s your unborn baby who’s going to pay for your stubborn stupidity.
What do you think? Please flood this stack with comments today because I’m secretly scared everyone else was Raptured but me. ;)
I know we've all joked about TDS, but the last year has shown us it's no longer funny; these people have a legitimate mental illness, are a danger to themselves and others, and honestly should be institutionalized... forcefully, if needed.
And EVERYONE should be subscribing to your Substack, so you skewed your own poll 😉
My head didn't explode until I read this: "even Tylenol says you shouldn’t take Tylenol when you’re pregnant." It's a strange cult.
I prayed for the one hospitalized.
As I consider this further, I have to wonder, are these tik tok warriors committing child abuse?