The Cat's Out of the Bag

The left really can't meme.

It’s virtually guaranteed that if Donald Trump is talking about pussies, the press is going to have a field day. (Sorry, I couldn’t resist.)

Literally me.

In his most recent feline faux pas, the former president ruffled liberal feathers (pun intended) by asserting during this week’s disastrous debate that Haitian immigrants in Springfield, Ohio, have been dining on the townspeople’s companion animals. “They’re eating the dogs, they’re eating the cats, they’re eating the pets of the people that live there," Trump thundered, echoing something his running mate had posted to X earlier the same day.

While Kamala snickered, Trump’s self-appointed opponent debate moderator David Muir responded by fact-checking the allegation on the spot, stating that ABC News had conveniently already contacted Springfield’s city manager, who confirmed that there had been "no credible reports of specific claims" of pets being harmed or eaten by immigrants.

Sounds to me as if there were reports… but someone, somewhere deemed them not credible. And there were claims—like “the immigrants are cooking our kittens!”—but they weren’t specific—as in “OMG Jean-Louis is barbecuing Mr. Whiskers!”

Gotcha. Similarly, “No selfies of the suspect robbing the bank were uploaded to social media.” [PSA: If you’re a fledgling defense attorney, write that one down.] Also, they knew Trump would bring up the Springfield All-You-Can-Eat Pet Buffet and were ready with the rebuttal? It’s almost like he was baited or something. Weird.

Maybe not credible but certainly specific.

In my favorite line of the whole painful exchange, Trump quipped, “Maybe he said that and maybe that’s a good thing to say for a city manager.” I mean, I don’t know if Mr. Muir knows this, but sometimes people actually lie to cover up scandalous things. (See: “I do not take performance-enhancing drugs,” “There is no sex abuse in the Catholic Church (and we certainly haven’t been hiding it for decades),” and “I did not have sexual relations with that woman.”)

As usual, the internet’s meme makers did not disappoint.

Ohio Attorney General Dave Yost accused the media of ignoring evidence supporting the supposedly outlandish claims. “There’s a recorded police call from a witness who saw immigrants capturing geese for food in Springfield,” he said. “Citizens testified to City Council. These people would be competent witnesses in court. Why does the media find a carefully worded City Hall press release better evidence?”

At the aforementioned City Council meeting, a distraught resident described seeing Haitian immigrants “grabbing ducks in the park, cutting off their heads, and eating them.” Neighbors are corroborating. A Springfield pastor verified the allegations. Lisa Montgomery, who has spent nearly a decade saving and rehoming wild geese in Ohio, insisted in an interview (that not a single US journalist had the curiosity to conduct, BTW) that neighborhood birds have been disappearing in alarming numbers. “I have had many people reach out from the Springfield area recently with concerns of ducks and geese being murdered for food,” Montgomery said. “I do have serious concerns over the issue and believe it to be true.” A horrifying post on X that I will never be able to unsee *you’ve been warned* features videos of roasting animals and dozens of comments confirming that Haitians in Haiti do, in fact, commonly consume animals we consider pets. Is it laughable—or even implausible—to suggest that it could happen here?

But you can’t say that some Haitians eat cats and dogs out loud or in print or God forbid during a presidential debate. You know, because it’s racist.

I am an American who enjoys a cheeseburger. If I went to India, where cows are sacred and many adhere to a vegetarian diet, I would not attempt to order a cheeseburger. I certainly would not break into someone’s pasture, slaughter a pet steer, and cook the flesh right there on their property. But would it be racist for the locals to identify me as someone who eats beef? Or is it simply a statement of truth; a fun fact about their pink-haired visitor? What if my vegan sister was with me; would it be racist to identify her as someone who comes from a country where they eat beef? Or is it merely an impartial bit of descriptive data?

I mean, TAKE MY VOTE.

The fact is, parts of China, Vietnam, Korea, Africa, and the Caribbean are known to routinely consume dog and cat meat. As revolting as most Americans may find this—and this American is barely keeping down her lunch as she types—the practice is culturally acceptable in other parts of the world. I remember listening to a Joe Rogan podcast where he said, “I love my dog. But if I had to, I would eat my dog. I wouldn’t want to. But if I had to survive and I had no other option, I would eat my dog.” (Yet another reason I am not cut out for Armageddon.) Incidentally, according to The Haitian Report, “Contrary to popular belief, Haitians don't eat cats because they are poor and hungry. They eat cats because it's a tradition…. a delicacy that many cannot resist.”

Whether or not Springfield’s pet population is at grave, immediate risk, Harris’s (and the moderators’ and the incompetent, intentionally apathetic left wing media’s) dismissive mockery of the claim itself is nothing but a convenient way to deflect attention from the larger, indisputable truth at hand: unchecked immigration is a serious, complex, urgent, growing problem. Of all the many frustrating opportunities to make a profound point Trump missed during the debate, that one sticks out like a Maine Coon in a fishbowl.

Harris has bragged about offering Temporary Protective Status (TPS) to tens of thousands of Haitian migrants. At least twenty thousand of them were sent to Springfield, a small town that had a population of about 58,000 people before the influx. Ohio AG Yost called the situation a disaster, which sounds like a gross understatement. Social services are strained, communicable diseases are on the rise, schools are struggling to educate students who can’t speak English, and residents insist their homes and streets (and yes, their pets) are unsafe.

Alas, all the feckless media can bring itself to cover are Trump’s “false/baseless/ridiculous accusations” of unthinkable animal cruelty.

Trump may have bombed that debate, but this won’t be his last rodeo. Besides, one carefully scripted response or surprisingly not-awful performance does not a president make. (Recall if you will that in 2016, Killary was crowned the debate winner sixty-two to twenty-seven percent.) And as my astute subscribers know, there’s more than one way to skin a cat. ;)

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