Shocking Report Explains Why the Media Isn't Covering Any Actual News
They're too busy counting the number of times Trump invokes Biden [*not satire]
If the press turned Trump-mentioning-Biden into a drinking game, they’d all be hammered. According to a groundbreaking new analysis by people with way too much free time and access to transcripts at their disposal, Trump has name-checked his predecessor at least 580 times since his second inauguration. That’s an average of six references to the Big Guy a day—which seems low to me, frankly, and coincidentally is the same number of times some of us open the fridge to see if any new snacks have magically appeared since last time we checked (spoiler: they have not).
“By this point in his presidency,” The New York Times wrote, “it is a central dictum that Mr. Biden is to blame for just about anything and everything. There is really no topic too small that Mr. Trump won’t try to trace it back to his predecessor.”
[*Author pauses to muse well, if the shoe fits.]
“Many a president has fixated on the guy who had the job before him, but when it comes to talking about it out loud, Mr. Trump is, as usual, in a league of his own. Is it an all-consuming obsession — or is there a political strategy at play from a man who considers himself a master marketer and who understands the power of repetition?”
The bombshell here, in case you missed it, is that Trump blurts out the word Biden more than most of us mutter please. Or Hey, Siri. Or why hasn’t RFK Jr. ended the Covid state of emergency and abolished the PREP Act yet? (Or, if you’re a mom, who took my oops never mind here it is.) He’s dropped his hapless forerunner’s name at press conferences, in speeches, on social media, and, most recently, on the Super Bowl of holy days, because apparently no occasion is too spiritual or pastel-themed for a political jab. (“Do you remember the bunny with Joe Biden? Do you remember when the bunny took Joe Biden out? He’s not taking Trump out.” Hahahahaha I actually love it when Trump trumps.) To hear the Times tell it, presidents are allowed—possibly even expected—to fixate on their nemeses in their heads; but that bombastic old blowhard we’ve got in office now doesn’t even have the decency to stew in silence.
“America may be well on its way to forgetting Joe Biden,” NBC News quipped in a shocking display of both insight and accuracy. “Its president isn’t.” At least the author of this particular piece seems to understand the game plan: “Mentioning Biden reminds voters that not so long ago, they were unhappy enough with high prices and illegal border crossings that they repudiated him and his hand-picked successor, Kamala Harris. Biden may also be a useful diversion from the whiplash of Trump’s term, shifting attention to the aged ex-president who struggled through speeches and looked unsteady on his feet.”
It’s a pretty solid strategy, if you ask me.
Based on the meticulously calculated data, Trump has made more references to the corpse man he replaced than to the country he’s running. Which means that people whose actual job it is to pay attention to important events and then report on them have instead spent God-only-knows-how-much-time crunching numbers and comparing months of word mentions.
REPORTER [breathless]: Boss! Robert F. Kennedy Jr. just said on live TV that Covid vaccines carry profound risks, and that in the clinical trials, there were 23% more deaths in the vaccine group than the placebo group! He actually said that the recommendation for kids is dubious and has always been dubious—and it sounds as if he wants them taken off the childhood schedule. This is HUGE! If I hurry, I might be able to get a print scoop!
EDITOR: You’re joking, right? First of all, Pfizer signs your paycheck, dumbass. Second of all, we’re extremely busy tallying Trump’s Biden citations this week. I think it’s going to be a record-breaker! That’s what the people care about.
I wonder if Swifties sit around tabulating how often Travis Kelce brings up Taylor’s army of exes.
In the end, it's really not that deep, even though the propaganda pushers make it sound as if Trump spends his days pining over his predecessor like they had a messy break-up and Biden got to keep the dog. And maybe he does! Truthfully, Trump could be pontificating about space exploration and still manage to throw in, “Biden couldn’t make it to the launchpad without tripping over a moon rock.” But that’s what Trump does. He brags. He rags. He boasts. He gloats. He mocks. He shocks. And the poor, woke, easily-triggered press takes the bait, every single time.
Me, I wouldn’t be surprised if Trump started referring to rotten eggs as “Stinky Robinettes” or nicknaming his janky golf swings “Crooked Joes” just to burrow even deeper under his haters’ chronically thin skin. And if Biden were smart *and chocolate was a weight loss miracle that grew on trees, he’d start bragging about how much money he saves every month by living rent-free in Trump’s head.
Why do you suppose the Fake News is so obsessed with Trump’s obsession with Biden? Wouldn’t you think they have more pressing issues to explore, maybe some sort of criminal corruption to uncover? LMK what you think in the comments. :)
MSM needs to look at their obsession with Trump- how many times per day do they say something negative about him? Can they count that high?
Trump may be the only president we’ve ever had who is also a decent stand up comic. But the media will never get it.