Oh, the Truth Hurts?

Facts don't have feelings—but some folks didn't get the memo.

Let’s play a fun game!

Imagine an automobile industry whistleblower comes forward with shocking new evidence that proves unequivocally that seatbelts actually cause more deaths than they prevent. Like, exponentially more. Infuriating, right? But wait, there’s more! It turns out—brace yourselves—that Big Car has known about this scandalous little factoid forever, but they spent decades and billions of dollars to intentionally mislead the public into believing the opposite. They had to, or else the Gill and Belinda Mates Foundation, which manufactures the world’s seatbelts when it’s not busy fluorinating the world’s water out of the goodness of its benevillainous heart because cavities and all, would have cut off all their funding and the entire industry would have crumbled and you’d be walking to work, uphill in the snow both ways, so count your blessings*.

*Unless your seatbelt killed you. In which case, RIP.

Even if the media covered this explosive revelation on a 24/7 loop which we all know they would not, there are people we share this planet with who would flat out refuse to believe it. You could show them independently verified, side-by-side death data of belted versus unbelted passengers; present emails from GBMF to Big Car threatening to pull their funding unless they unleashed a splashy new seatbelt campaign; show canceled, seven-figure checks from GBMF to every police precinct on the planet with SEATBELT ENFORCEMENT BRIBERY PAYMENT in the memo line; play a leaked, hidden camera video of Gill and Belinda howling about the 27-car pileup that resulted in sixty-six fatalities even though every single decedent was wearing a seatbelt hahahahaha. Big Car could take out a full page ad in the New York Times not only admitting to but detailing their malfeasance. As insane as it sounds, if the pandemic has taught us anything, it’s that none of this would matter to an alarming segment of the planetary populace.

Them: “Seatbelts save lives!”

You: “Actually, that was all a big lie. Here are eleven hundred pages of authenticated proof.”

Them: “Sorry, but we saw those crash test dummy videos in high school health class, so...”

You: “That was pure publicity hype. Completely made up. Thanks to a FOIA, we have videos showing that every single crash test dummy was sliced in half by its seatbelt on impact. Want to see them?”

Them: “No! You’re a liar.”

You: “There’s indisputable proof. It’s—”

Them: “You leave me and my seatbelt alone! You’re a selfish granny killer! Shouldn’t you be at a KKK rally with your MAGA buddies or something?”

You think I’m being hyperbolic just to get a few laughs, don’t you? I wish I were, honestly. Alas, I present to you this week’s viral TikToker, a woman who felt the need to film her tearful meltdown after being told—by a bevy of nurses, one after another, straight to her weeping, incredulous face—that masks are useless.

It began when a wise, experienced vile, cold-hearted nurse tossed a “bonus mask” into Bawlina’s [not her real name] purse. Per the victim, this is the actual exchange that ensued:

Bawlina: “Oh, thank you, I can always use more of those.”

Nurse: “Yeah, we can use less of them.”

Bawlina: “Oh, I know. We’re all really tired of wearing masks. I get it.”

Nurse: “No, they’re pointless.”

Bawlina: “What? Even in an oncology and hematology infusion center, you feel that masks are pointless?”

Nurse: “Yeah. We didn’t wear them before COVID.”

Bawlina: “Even with neutropenic patients, even with patients that have no white count, no immunity, no nothing, you still feel that masks are completely irrelevant?”

Nurse: “Yeah.”

Bawlina [gasps]: “Wow.”

Bawlina repeated her “even with” question several times, flabbergasted that she was getting the same response. “I had three to four grown women who are nurses look at me and tell me [there was no logical, medical reason to wear a mask],” she cried into her camera. And then—and this is the not-shocking part to anyone who has ever interacted with a millennial before—Bawlina turned what could have been an eye-opening, self-reflective peek into how propaganda works into a sad, woe-is-me moment that revolved entirely around (you’ll never guess) her hurt little feelings.

This is my imagined version of the ensuing exchange Bawlina alluded to:

Bawlina: “You don’t think I matter!”

Nurse: “What on earth are you talking about? Of course you matter. Everyone matters! What does that have to do with masks not doing diddly?”

Bawlina: “I see where I stand in this hierarchy! How can you be so callous?”

Nurse: “Look, lady. I’m sorry your dad wasn’t around when you were little or your husband cheated on you, but I’m literally just saying that wearing a mask to protect you from germs is like putting up a chain link fence to keep the mosquitos out of your yard. It doesn’t work. Don’t take it personally.”

Bawlina [breathing into a paper bag]: “I’m going to need a minute to unpack your horrific insensitivity.”

Suppose four traffic cops tell you that the onramp you’re trying to turn onto is closed because there’s a giant sinkhole in the middle of it. Or four baristas suggest ordering anything but the Ethiopian Peaberry (they *might* have found a rat carcass in the urn). Or four Best Buy employees try to talk you out of purchasing one of the off-label clearance rack phone chargers that have spontaneously imploded and caused a dozen house fires in the past month. Are you going to aggressively ignore their warnings before whipping out your phone to document your emotional wounds? Or are you going to thank these honorable professionals for being straight with you and trying to steer you toward safety?

I’ve covered cognitive dissonance and Stockholm Syndrome and the Milgram experiments in previous posts; Peter McCullough did a brilliant job outlining mass formation psychosis on Joe Rogan’s podcast; Tess Lawrie has explored the adaptive unconscious—that part of our brain that is profoundly influenced by propaganda, past traumas, marketing, and more. In my mind, these phenomena are all related and can be categorically described as an inability (or refusal) to acknowledge objective reality even when it is slapping you in the face like a wet fish. As Mark Twain is credited with quipping, “It’s easier to fool people than to convince them they’ve been fooled.”

Truer words may have never been spoken.

I’m not making fun of the sniveling millennial featured here; frankly, I feel sorry for her. Despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary—including literal medical professional insistence, a sweeping gold standard review of masks, and the incontrovertible fact that face diapers were barely a thing outside of the OR before COVID—she bought into the pandemic baloney and nothing anyone can say will change her mind. And now she’s sad, which makes the truth-tellers the bad guys.

Well played, propagandists. Well played.

Come on, commenters. Let me know what you think. You never disappoint.

Bawlina needs to read this book. So do you.