Common Sense is Now a Conspiracy
"Wait, now you want to start testing drugs *before* giving them to billions of people?"
By all means, let’s all collapse onto fainting couches and demand a Level 5 Outrage Alert over Robert F. Kennedy Jr.’s latest unthinkable move: In a burst of insanity rivaled only by that time someone suggested strapping babies into car seats instead of letting them roll around in the backseat like bowling pins, our deranged HHS Secretary has actually declared that we should start testing vaccines. Thoroughly and properly. You know, against placebos, like saline or sugar water. Oh, and also these new options shouldn’t contain the sketchy mRNA technology that teaches our cells to build spike protein like it’s a Lego kit from hell.
What’s next? Suggesting we wash our hands after handling feces and cook chicken all the way through?
And just like that, the Earth cracked open and the ghost of Jonas Salk was seen sobbing into his microscope. According to modern virologists like Rachel Maddow, disliking mRNA is the equivalent of denying gravity or licking doorknobs during a flu outbreak. But is it really so unreasonable to prefer an old-school vaccine—one made with inactivated viruses—over a platform so new that its long-term effects are still officially filed under “TBD”?
What RFK Jr. is proposing is actually something that used to be called science: You give a thing. You compare it to not giving the thing. You track both outcomes. You repeat the test, refine the parameters, publish the data, and resist the temptation to flog anyone who points out any flaws in your work. But somewhere along the line, logic left the building, Science™ got sold to the highest bidder, and not-testing became the new black.
From the always contrary New York Times:
“Every other medicine is tested against a placebo,” Mr. Kennedy said on a podcast in January 2020, in claiming that vaccines are exempt from that requirement.
That, however, is not entirely correct. Cancer drugs and other medications authorized under the F.D.A.’s accelerated approval program are regularly authorized after trials without a placebo.
In case you missed the hilarious irony, the point they rush to make is that vaccines aren’t the only medications to make it to market unsafely. The FDA does that with all sorts of drugs!
Mr. Kennedy has also raised concerns in the past about testing a vaccine against what many scientists consider a reasonable placebo: the same formula, but without the immune-activating agents. Mr. Kennedy has noted that the practice leaves uncertainty about whether ingredients in the formula could cause harm.
SOMEONE SMART: “What if we tested vaccines against a Tic Tac® or something so we could isolate any side effects?”
MANY SCIENTISTS: “That’s… that’s… just unreasonable!”
An HHS spokesperson called the move to placebo-control a “radical departure” from existing standards, which is a diplomatic way of saying, “We’re not sure what the last several administrations were thinking, but we’re going to bring sanity back to the lab.” Kennedy’s policy, much to the horror of Fauci nostalgists, basically boils down to: You’re gonna have to prove it works. You’d think he’d announced a plan to mandate glitter therapy and replace nurses with Roombas. Instead, he’s saying: “Let’s not rubber-stamp annual boosters for evolving viruses using expired trials from a pandemic no one’s emotionally recovered from.” And all of this came after he committed the ultimate heresy: advising new parents to “do their own research.” No wonder they want him burned at the stake. In a system that rewards obedience, independent thought is scarier than any infectious disease—and Kennedy just went full super-spreader.
“This sows doubt!” cried the “experts” who rotate between CNN interviews and board seats. Yes, it does. Because doubt is supposed to be part of science. The alternative is a faith-based model where pharmaceutical CEOs hand down commandments from a flaming bush shaped like a weasel Fauci.
“Most immediately, Mr. Kennedy’s move could affect the next round of Covid booster shots, expected to become available in the fall,” the Times moaned before graciously making Kennedy’s argument for him. “Both flu shots and Covid boosters have been authorized without extensive human trials to target new strains of the virus as it has evolved.”
See? We do it all the time. Why the sudden outrage?
Meanwhile, career scientists at the FDA are furious that Kennedy is interfering with their sacred system—the same one that greenlit opioids, approved Alzheimer’s drugs with zero measurable benefit and a slew of side effects, and rushed through Covid shots while humming “Don’t Stop Believin’” over piles of missing data. Their comically ironic argument? “It would be unethical to deprive even a small group of patients of effective vaccines against deadly pathogens.”
“Mr. Kennedy is one of the nation’s leading vaccine skeptics, and he has been vocal about his disdain for mRNA technology,” the Times added, spiraling ever deeper into despair. A memo to the Gray Lady: Even if mRNA “vaccines” weren’t murderous poisons *which they are,* they don’t prevent infection, don’t block transmission, don’t last, and haven’t exactly outshone last decade’s dusty flu vaccine. But tell me again how suggesting we explore alternatives is now somehow... anti-science? I’m sorry, but when exactly did the logic bus flip over, and why wasn’t it all over X?
Never one to pass up a chance to fearmonger, the Times naturally included a chilling warning that “tens of thousands of people can die without protection against Covid.” (Note the interesting choice of the word can and not could.) Ironically, the CDC reports that only 23% of adults have even gotten the latest booster. At this point, Kennedy could mandate that jabs be delivered by carrier pigeon and more than three quarters of Americans wouldn’t even notice. But we’re supposed to believe he’s undermining trust by advocating for safety? Sirs, trust left the building with the Delta variant and took your plexiglass dividers with it.
We live in a minute where the CDC is still recommending masking, testing, and social distancing, three moves proven to be made up, worthless, or both. The bar is low. Kennedy's bar is, arguably, just a smidge higher—he wants actual trial data, not just press releases and declarations of “emergencies.” The response: Testing new boosters before administering them is unethical! You honestly can’t make this stuff up.
So yes, let’s wring our hands. Let’s pen Pinocchio-approved New York Times pieces waxing confused about “the decline of trust.” Let’s pretend Kennedy’s the lunatic for wanting to restore faith in a system that burned its credibility to the ground and then blamed the ashes on “conspiracies.” Let’s accuse him of breaking the system instead of merely being the first public health figure with the audacity to point out the biblical cracks in the foundation. People just might buy it.
I would rather lick 50 doorknobs than listen to a second of Rachel Maddow spewing lies. I find it fascinating that the majority of dimwits out there accept the fact that regular drugs they pop can have side effects, and even adverse events-like the tv ads say—including the uttered DEATH word. They just don’t think it will happen to them. But pushing a syringe into your body, or your child’s body, filled with “something wet” is perfectly fine and dandy. Head scratching at the moment.
It’s unclear to me why anyone wants to be a scientist (by definition an expert) since they are always baffled and alarmed. How wearing it must be.