A-List Actress Apologizes for Not Being a Complete A**hole
It was a momentary weakness; it won't happen again.
It’s not easy being famous in Hollywood. You’ve got to look good, sound humble, pretend to hate capitalism while cashing seven-figure checks, and most importantly, never, ever accidentally say something nice about a conservative. Even one who’s just been brutally slain on a public stage.
America’s freakiest scream queen, Jamie Lee Curtis, dared to break from the pack—and it nearly cost her her career. On a podcast recorded just two days after Charlie Kirk’s murder, Curtis—through seemingly sincere tears—committed the unforgivable sin of not celebrating the assassination of a political adversary.
“I mean, I disagreed with him on almost every point I ever heard him say,” an emotional Curtis said on the ‘WTF With Marc Maron’ podcast that aired September 15. “But I believe he was a man of faith, and I hope in that moment when he died, that he felt connected to his faith. Even though I find what his ideas were abhorrent to me, I still believe he’s a father and a husband and a man of faith, and I hope whatever ‘connection to God’ means, that he felt it.”
I’m no Curtis fan, but it was a decent thing to say. It wasn’t gushing or over the top, but she was saying something few progressives were saying at the time: a young man’s death was tragic no matter which side he was on. What a concept. She wasn’t apologetic or apoplectic. It didn’t sound like she was acting (and if she was, she’s got far more talent than I’ve ever given her credit for). She seemed genuinely, appropriately moved.
While the right applauded her ability to transcend politics for even a brief moment, the liberal backlash was swift and furious. Curtis (who has a transgender daughter) was a traitor to trans people. A publicity-whore. A conservative racist. A total f*cktard.
But her fans needn’t worry! She didn’t mean to be morally adequate, honest! People are taking her sympathy out of context and twisting it around to make it sound like she’d suggested he wasn’t despicable or something. That’s obviously not what she meant at all! She’s so adamant about restoring her progressive purity, in fact, that she’s embarked on an unofficial Unapology Tour, making the media rounds to set the record straight.
“An excerpt of [the WTF podcast] mistranslated what I was saying as I wished him well, like I was talking about him in a very positive way, which I wasn’t,” Curtis went out of her way to explain. “I was simply talking about his faith in God. So it was a mistranslation, which is a pun, but not.”
Can you imagine? Having a moment of humanity and humility and then being forced to retract it or else get booted from the group chat?
Faced with a social Sophie’s Choice—apologize for being human or admit to being a complete jerk—Curtis did what every terrified celebrity does when the mob comes for them: she backpedaled faster than a Peloton instructor who forgot to post her smoothie bowl. She claimed that she wanted to “clarify” her comments, but what she really wanted to do was recant them. And instead of painting her as moralistic or even misunderstood, the reverse-engineering backfired spectacularly: “Look, I swear to you—I’m a mean person. Nasty, even. The right-wing media is trying to make me look semi-likable. I’m not. You have to believe me!”
Apparently, it is now La-La-Land law that if someone to the right of Bernie Sanders dies, you must respond with a public exorcism, followed by a GoFundMe for their enemies. Thoughts and prayers are strictly prohibited—unless the thoughts are hateful and the prayers are for “better diversity in the afterlife.”
One of my favorite stories from when my daughters were little was the time my youngest (around six) said to her older sister, “Sophie, I’m not trying to be nice or anything, but I love your outfit!” That’s basically Hollywood empathy: “I’m not trying to be nice or anything, but may your soul rest in peace.”
In an interview with Variety, Curtis called the reaction to her initial statements “relentless and threatening,” chalking the whole mess up to a “mistranslation”—as if the listening audience simultaneously hallucinated compassion—and obviously not keen on being thrown into the old basket of deplorables with the likes of Roseanne Barr.
Meanwhile, People wrote a full article explaining that Curtis didn’t actually mean to wish Charlie Kirk well, she just accidentally said words that sounded halfway-civilized. She even managed to slip in a pseudo-philosophical TED Talk about “holding two contradictory ideas”—you know, like being charitable and not wanting your career to die.
Let’s be real: what the Halloween heroine meant was, “Please don’t cross me off the Met Gala invite list.”
In Tinseltown, there’s a strict emergency protocol for moments like this. If you so much as sound mildly sympathetic toward anyone even remotely MAGA-adjacent, you must blame context, cry on cue, and quickly and fully pivot your position. (It probably doesn’t hurt if you write a fat check to Planned Parenthood, too.) Well played, Jamie Lee. You might just live to work another day.
***A million actual thanks to those of you who have already pre-ordered my forthcoming book, The War on Chlorine Dioxide, and apologies if you experienced any technical difficulties trying to do so. I *think* all those kinks have been ironed out—but please do let me know if you have any problems! :)
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- Gavin de Becker
bestselling author, The Gift of Fear
So she disagreed w/ Charlie on almost every level? She didn’t agree with him on what exactly?? Being a good person, supporting family values, supporting strong men and not labeling everyone toxic masculine? He was kind to the LGBT and trans community. He simply questioned them and their choices. There’s nothing wrong with that. There’s nothing wrong with asking questions. He made people think. That’s the scary part to these so-called progressives: that we can actually think for ourselves and we don’t have to follow the leftist, liar, sheep agenda. I sincerely doubt whether Jamie Lee Curtis actually ever listened to a single word that Charlie Kirk ever said
This is probably the most disgusting thing someone can do. Saying you're sorry for being human to appease a group of people with the morals of a snake is just gross. And I can't believe it has become far more popular to celebrate someone's death than to feel sad for the loved ones left behind. Makes me want to vomit. This is why I shut down my social media accounts. I can't see that crap every day and not be affected.