What Comes After "Assassination Attempt" on the Globalist Itinerary?

(Hint: It sounds a lot like anotherassassinationattempt.)

While the world continues to reel from the epic failure of the Secret Service to protect President Trump from some loud popping noises a blatant assassination attempt that scores of people saw coming and tried to prevent, life on the third rock goes on. VP candidates get picked, bikini clad trophy wives frolic in Mykonos, the climate change PR campaign remains stuck in screaming overdrive.

It’s a lot to keep up with, especially when you keep getting sucked into stories like “Secret Service boss blames ‘sloped roof’ for not putting sniper team on building used by would-be Trump assassin.”

I wish I were making that up.

They spelled incriminating wrong.

Look at those guys on the left barely able to remain upright on that roof. It’s just so slopy.

Cheatle: “Can you guys put some sort of spin on this?”

SS Publicist: “What about Hanlon’s Razor?”

Cheatle: “What’s that?”

SS Publicist: “‘Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.’"

Cheatle: “Ooh, yeah! That’s good!”

As much as I would love a break from the Assassination News Network, how can you think of anything else right now? It’s becoming increasingly clear that—at least to the extent that no attempt was made to stop the attempt on Trump’s life and that several people have reported seeing multiple shooters on site—the whole thing had to have been an inside job.

And if that’s true—and I beg you to prove it wrong—do you suppose the perpetrators of that colossal flop are just going to accept defeat and go fry a few ants with a magnifying glass to get their murderous thrills? I don’t think so, Maynard.

They want him dead.

And whoever “they” are—the ones pulling the strings or the triggers or whatever it is they pull—they’re not alone. There are plenty of folks on this perplexed planet who’d prefer an expired version of DJT to the fist-pumping, fight-fight-fight, MAGA-loving one, including the countless disgusting humans openly lamenting “he missed” after the assault. I wonder if any of the haters ever stop to imagine what this country/world would (will?) look like in the wake of a successful Trump takedown.

Spoiler: It won’t be pretty.

Emotion aside (which is not easy for this kittens-and-sunshine gal to do but I work for you people), you have to ask yourself, why do they want him dead? There are only a handful of possible explanations:

1. They don’t care either way; he’s just a useful stooge in their gun control agenda.

2. If elected, he’ll immediately implement Project 2025, which calls for a prompt and drastic overhaul of dozens of federal agencies including the FBI, which is accurately described as a “bloated, arrogant, increasingly lawless organization” in the document. (FWIW, Trump claims to “know nothing” about the project.)

3. They’re the good guys who know he’s a bad guy and their singular goal is to protect the American people and the world so they must remove him for our own good hahahahahahahaha but seriously some people think this.

4. He threatens something they want or stand for and must be stopped at all costs so they can continue to get/have/exploit that thing.

5. They know they can’t beat him; see #4.

What do you think is the true reason, and why number 5?

There was a Brady Bunch episode where Marcia and Greg were running against each other for student body president. (Someone recorded this version at 2X speed so they all sound like chipmunks; you’re welcome). When the campaign trail began to get contentious, Mike dropped a wisdom bomb on the sparring stepsiblings: “We’re going to be a family for a lot longer than either Marcia or Greg is going to be in office.”

Why can’t people be half as wise and thoughtful as a seventies sitcom dad?

The internet is teeming with grim predictions about what the next several months are going to look like, especially if the lone shooters of the world are successful at unaliving either candidate (TL; DW: false flags, cyber attacks, civil unrest, food shortages, martial law, mass hysteria). If I were a billionaire running for office with a target the size of Texas on my back, I think I’d be spending some hefty coin on private security protection and not leaving that task to the folks who desperately want me dead.

LMK what you think is going to happen in this messed-up movie next in the comments (but, you know, try to keep it positive I realize that’s probably not possible).

Treat yo’self. You deserve it.