178 Comments
User's avatar
Meddling Kid's avatar

If we can have traffic courts and immigration courts, it’s about damned time that we have federal airline courts, and since pilots have to retire earlier than most careers, only THEY would be eligible to be its judges.

And unlike the “three strikes” rules, it should be a strict progression - one major strike like starting a fight or two minor strikes like arguing with a flight attendant and you’re out - permanently. Not just from that airline, but from all commercial aviation.

Valerie's avatar

This is genius, love it.

David Nelson's avatar

"If more agencies asked Meddling Kid for advice, it would be a fine world. (I venture to guess some of the advice would be 'Go out of business; you are not needed, and are in the way.')

Meddling Kid's avatar

Make me king for a day and I guarantee I can permanently fix about 1/3 of what ails this world…

…and probably further screw up the other 2/3.

David Nelson's avatar

...not knowing, necessarily, which part is which. I think there's a law that if you pick totally at random, you'll get about a 1/3 of it right, after correcting for the natural tendency of all things to go to h*ll in h*ndb*sket.

Valerie's avatar

Absolutely

Occam's avatar

omg that's the best comment today. Bravo

Jim Riddle's avatar

A sub comment dealt with a passenger "testing mildly positive" for hantavirus. I had a prof in math who said getting an integral part right is like getting a girl part pregnant - you either do or you don't. Same thing for a virus, if indeed it is a virus. It's a PCR test. PCR can generally be used to show that anyone has any disease you want to pick on that day. It can also be used to scare the media into believing that we should all start wearing masks and gloves and go into lockdown because it might be contagious.

Momcat's avatar

I remember when a guy flew into Dallas, was sick on the plane, & went to hospital & died from ebola & the county judge tried to act like ebola was no big deal! County Judge went to the guys apt, shamed anyone that complained. Two nurses got it, one hospitalized, other went shopping for a wedding dress & he insisted it was no big deal. No other casualties or anyone getting it. It was major news here til the nurse was released. She sued the hospital for being exposed to it. But when covid showed up, County Judge was arresting people right & left.

Margie G's avatar

Media will also soon be warning us against taking chloroquine and/or hydroxychloroquine because it doesn't work against hantavirus *wink, wink*

Kaycee's avatar

I have very very few flight plans for my future. I want to be as anonymous as I can be and with more and more biometric shit going on, I just would rather not put myself in places where it will be used. Also I hate traveling by plane because of the mass of people - sardines in the plane, in the terminal - it is gross and disgusting in most cases.

SHug's avatar

And people, being people, some are going to do disgusting things in public. Like peeling & eating dead skin, taking stinky shoes off of stinky feet, clipping toenails, propping their dirty feet on the side of the seat in front of them, dragging their long (possibly greasy) hair down the back of the seat in front of your face, landing it in your snack/drink. Ugh. I don't like most people on the best of days, on the worst of days after being practically strip searched, Xrayed, wanded, waiting, waiting, then treated like cattle to get into a metal tube - Just No. Last time my BF came to see me, she flew first class - said it was worth it to not have to deal with all the idiots in coach/economy.

Cindi's avatar

I have a son living in Japan so flying (every other year) is life. This Oct we are going business class for the 1st time & I hear it will be worth it. Hope so.

Jpeach's avatar

Flying is becoming inhumane. Kinda goes with promoting 15 minute cities.

Jeff Johnson's avatar

If I never have to go to an airport and get on another airplane for the rest of my life, that will be more than OK with me. Ironically, my oldest daughter is a flight attendant!

Pat Wetzel's avatar

I've traveled a fair amount and no longer find the process intriguing. I remember my first trip to London. I was 5 or 6. I wore a light grey wool doubled breasted suit with mother of pearl buttons, pleated skirt, little white socks and probably Mary Janes. One dressed to travel. Grateful to have had the experiences and memories. These days I try to avoid the masses, in the air and elsewhere.

Jeff Johnson's avatar

Yes, I remember those days, long gone by. And I am with you, avoiding the masses is a high priority. I live in rural Texas AWAY from the madding crowd of DFW, Austin, Houston, and San Antonio. And I love it!

Pat Wetzel's avatar

Idaho here, but too many Californians. Nice people, often conservatively minded, but their only frame of cultural reference is CA. They totally lack any self awareness. But Land Rover is their official car. Thinking about Wyoming.

Jeff Johnson's avatar

Oh my gosh, yes! Even when they finally get a TX license plate, they leave the CA area frame on the car, and frankly, they might as well announce they're NOT from Texas. And just as the Californians they are, they're so easily identifiable it's kind of funny.

Pat Wetzel's avatar

I find it both overwhelming and tedious. I'll have to remember to revive my sense of humor!

Jeff Johnson's avatar

Yep, it definitely helps!

Tom Wiedemeier's avatar

This is why nightclubs have bouncers.

John Wright's avatar

Getting bounced at 30,000 feet could be a bit extreme.

Curtis's avatar

I'd totally film that!

Tom Wiedemeier's avatar

Give them a parachute.

Tom Wiedemeier's avatar

Only if that perk comes with the ticket

John Wright's avatar

That'll totally help them when you drop them into the ocean!

John Wright's avatar

Oh how sweet of you Tom. Next you'll be adding free swimming lessons and perhaps some shark repellent. 🤣

Pastor Mike's avatar

This is what is keeping me from that Alaska cruise my wife wants to go on. Well that, and having to fly into and board the ship in Seattle.

Jan's avatar

We want to go to Alaska again but have to fly to our land/sea port from Illinois to anchorage. Thought about the Canadian Rockies train option to Alaska. Hubby doesn’t want to fly that initial distance nor take the cruise. It’s our 60th anniversary next year. Anyone done that, the train or both? It’s our big trip to do while we can.

KatWarrior's avatar

Hey Janet, What a fantastic idea! I know a few Canucks who took the train threw the Rockies and lived to tell the tale! 😂

But seriously, it’s supposed to be a spectacular trip. Hubs and I did the treacherous drive and I had a panic attack a few times. I have never seen anything so grand and magically beautiful.

Jan's avatar

Great! I’m pushing we do that. (Train). We camp off grid in Wyoming. I’ve actually gotten out of the truck at a couple of tiny twisty hairpins at high altitude. 😱

KatWarrior's avatar

No can do on the twisty hairpin turns. Yeesh! 😳

SuszaQ's avatar

The train ride really was beautiful, especially when you get up into BC

KatWarrior's avatar

Alberta and BC are beyond! ❤️🔥

SuszaQ's avatar

Yep, we did it last year. Seward to Vancouver. Then train for two days up to Banff. The cruise was just OK, meaning the ports were really crap. The ship was great and only 720 passengers. If you do excursions, pay the money and go with a smaller group. I wish we would’ve done that. I hate cruises anyway, and this one I was supposed to be taking my mother-in-law since she had not traveled in a long time and really missed being able to travel. Her husband had a fall and she couldn’t go with at the last minute so rather than cancel and pay the extortionist fees they charge you if you have to cancel my husband and I decided to go. Banff was beautiful.

Jan's avatar

We did similar for our 50th. Anchorage, train to Mt McKinley then busses up to Fairbanks , small plane to Dawson City then bus to the old mining RR down to the cruise to Vancouver. Loved it, especially glacier bay. The naturalist onboard talked to us and everyone went back inside. I stayed out on the deck and watched whales breech 😁 whales 🐳 🐳🐳 We just want to get to Alaska and tour around there and go home by plane. I’ve got a brochure for a company that does all sorts of different ways to do Alaska and an awesome travel agent friend. Our cruise only had one stop (Ketchikan) and it rained hard the whole day. I can miss the cruise. Although I could have as much bacon as I wanted. Lol. The outside excursions you book worked great.

David Nelson's avatar

Susza, please translate this: "If you do excursions, pay the money and go with a smaller group." for someone who still rides Greyhound. I wouldn't know an "excursion" if it crawled up and bit me on the leg, and UNLESS it crawls up by its self, I'll have no other way to find it.

Justin's avatar

The cruise lines has excursions available, which they book with local groups at each port. For an extra fee. You can book with the groups themselves for a lower cost, and the groups are typically smaller.

David Nelson's avatar

Ahhh, I thought an "excursion" was a DIFFERENT SMALLER cruise ship cruising alongside the MAINSTREAM one. I completely flubbug[g?]nated the entire picture. Resuming my seat near the back.

SuszaQ's avatar

Hahah. You’re funny!😆

Jan's avatar

That’s what we did. Getting into those suits for the white water rapid trip was a hoot in itself. The day we were to bus up to Mt McKinley was a snowstorm so didn’t see that but got some freebies from the tour company. Some buses got stuck for hours out there. Saw every kind of bear in Alaska on a hillside while on a flatboat tour. Memorable trip.

SuszaQ's avatar

True. Next time I would just do my research and book those local tours myself.

But there won’t be a next time because I really don’t care for cruises other than river cruises.

David Nelson's avatar

...begging the question, "What's so good about 'river' cruises?" and, more personally because my wife brought up the subject out-of-the-blue, "Can you recommend a few, or any, in the Midwest?" (Or Texas. I'd drive to Texas for one. For anything, really.)

SuszaQ's avatar

Hi David, A lot of cruise lines will offer one “ Free” Offshore excursion. For instance, one that we signed up for was whale watching It was a complete wanker…way too many people on the boat. The weather was awful, which is not in their control, of course but they can only stay in an area where the whales are for a certain amount of time and then have to move on with the weather being so bad, the visibility was terrible, and there were just too many people. So by paying for a private excursion company, you can get a much better experience on a much smaller boat, where you can get into areas where the big boats cannot go. Does that help?

David Nelson's avatar

Indeed! And it makes perfect sense! And it explains, very well, how pricing winnows demand into smaller and smaller lots! Many thanks for the extra insights!

SHug's avatar

Didn't see any that go around the TX coast yet, but this one is supposed to have one coming up this year, not yet on the schedule. https://www.americancruiselines.com/find-a-cruise or there are always Private Charters! That would be esp fun if there is a group

Carnival, Royal Caribbean, Disney, and Norwegian—operate year-round and seasonal cruises from Galveston, Texas, departing directly into the Gulf of Mexico. These cruises primarily head to Western Caribbean destinations.

And there are river cruises all over the country, this is one in TX https://www.vtrc.com/?

Teresa Thibodeaux's avatar

We took a tour combined with a cruise in Alaska about 10 years ago. It was a great trip, flew to Fairbanks, bused around, train on last day of ground travel and 3 days cruising thru glaciers. I’d do it again.

Whatever yall end up doing, have a great time!

cds's avatar

Holland America does the cruise really well, get a suite, it's a BIG anniversary! Take a lot of immunity supplements and your Ivermectin! ENJOY! Took a flight to Anchorage. But, i bet the train would be cool.

Jan's avatar

Our last Alaska thing was Holland America. Super cruise line for our age and younger.

Pastor Mike's avatar

Whew ... I thought I was in the Dog House. My last few Comments the last week had been missing the "Coveted" ~ "Liked by Jenna" ~ vote of confidence. I see I am now back on her good side. 🤣🤣

Meddling Kid's avatar

Perhaps they weren’t snarky enough. She likes snark. I think it’s her love language. ❤️❤️❤️

Patti F's avatar

Sailing out of Seattle was one of the easiest, fastest embarkation process we've ever experienced. And the Alaska cruise!! Amazing. Do it. It was by far our favorite cruise we've ever taken. I'd do it again tomorrow if I could.

kittynana's avatar

@Pastor- DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We did the same itinerary last August. DO IT!!!!!!!

New Scott's avatar

The worst part about travelling is the travelling part.

Meddling Kid's avatar

But also the not being at home part too.

Vince's avatar

Correct the getting there part is awful. As soon as they figure out how to safely portal everywhere, airlines will be out of business.

Indrek Sarapuu's avatar

Tested "mildly positive"?

Sorta "could be", "maybe", we're just not sure...

John Wright's avatar

Not sure... but still, you should be *afraid*. 🤣

David Nelson's avatar

...and NOT JUST MILDLY AFRAID either!!!

John Wright's avatar

Downright terrified! One little whiff of those little buggers and Fauci will have the population wearing four masks!

Justin's avatar

Well, being lactose intolerant, I'm nobody's friend if I've had a rich creamy parfait just before the flight.

For $50, I can be steered toward a less treacherous dessert.

David Nelson's avatar

Yes, fellow Americans, one way to make your dissatisfaction with the current state of commercial flying known, and still perfectly legal. (Idle question: do odors have DNA content?)

John Wright's avatar

{laugh} That's one way to offset the cost of the flight.

Meddling Kid's avatar

Mildly positive means they only had to turn up the PCR cycles to 30 instead of the 50 they used for faking COVID results.

Will Falconer, DVM's avatar

Get ready also for: "asymptomatic carriers" which really means someone exposed to a disease, not ever sick from it, healthy enough to NOT MAKE SYMPTOMS (key understanding), but we want you to FEAR the possibility! Gaaa!!!!

Anna Lafferty's avatar

I don't know which is funnier - texting someone that you're about to fly over their house and them responding with a plane overhead is that you? - or you promising not to bite, Jenna!!!

Crixcyon's avatar

Now you know why I haven't flown since 1983. But I know others who love it.

Tim Pallies's avatar

'83? A little early, but it makes sense now.

John Wright's avatar

I believe my last flight was around 2017. 1983 does sound "too early" for giving up flying.

John Wright's avatar

"Mildly positive" 🤣 That's hilarious! Do they really expect this fear porn to work again? Is the general population really this stupid? (don't answer that!)

I love the "Humanity is collapsing but we can still laugh"!

And yes, yet another reminder that my decision to stop flying was a good decision.

Patti F's avatar

My son just asked me this morning on the way to school if everything is going to shut down again. The damage they did to kids is disgusting. He was in 6th grade when the world shut down and life was a complete nightmare. Now he's getting ready to start his senior year and he's terrified they're going to do it to him again.

John Wright's avatar

😢 That's truly sad.

clem h fandango's avatar

I spent a few minutes on BlueSky (not advised) and they were all in panic mode. Someone even posted "I'd sure feel better if Fauci was involved!"

John Wright's avatar

The little I glimpsed on Twitter was a ton of people laughing at the WHO and their dire warnings.

SHug's avatar

So, maybe it won't be safe for them to be protesting everywhere for every little thing?

MartyB's avatar

My wife is claustrophobic, so we don’t fly. I don’t miss it because of The Airport Experience- I’m sure I’m on another list due to the muttering under my breath and general hostile attitude while involuntarily acting out my small part in Security Theater. So we drive everywhere, and rarely see arguments, let alone fist fights, in the minivan.

David Nelson's avatar

Well, MY wife told me she doesn't like long car trips because I "sit too close" to her, in the 2-seater we tour in. I'm looking for a motorcycle, so she can have the entire back to herself...

David Nelson's avatar

And there goes yet another simple, good fantasy blown to bits.

Pat Wetzel's avatar

LOVE a road trip!

Ginny Moore's avatar

Clown World: Ariplane Edition. 🤡✈️ Ugh. Bad ass. 🤬🍑😘🥰

Claudia's avatar

Thanks Jenna!

I've flown quite a bit and haven't had any inflight kerfuffles... does it appear to happen often because it is being filmed, and viral, or am I just lucky?

Also, serious question - what do we think needs to happen in order to keep in flight peace?

One more: why was that guy who bit the passenger striped naked to the waist as he was being escorted out? what was going on there?

Patti F's avatar

It's like all the cruise line fights that get posted. I've cruised over 15 times, most of them on Carnival (the one that seems to get the most videos) and I've never EVER witnessed a fight or even people arguing. I've only ever experienced people having fun and mostly being polite (there are always the jerks who try to get on the elevator before everyone has gotten off, but that's not cruise-only behavior). I don't fly much, but my daughter used to fly every month and she never witnessed anything either. I think it's all just a few videos going viral. Think about how many flights are in the air at any given time - there's bound to be something going on on one of them.

John Wright's avatar

I do wonder about perception. Personally I have never witnessed any drama on a flight. We have more coverage now, so the rare events get shared widely on social media.

JSR's avatar

We fly often… and have never witnessed the craziness I see online.. we even fly through Atlanta most of the time 😂😂

SHug's avatar

Bless your heart.

JSR's avatar

Why thank you 😂

Sheila's avatar

Your P.S. is my laugh of the day 🤣 I LOVE the idea of mildly positive illnesses haha.