An Open Letter to Robert F. Kennedy, Jr.

On That Thing We Voted for You to Do.

Dear Secretary Kennedy,

First of all, wow. You’ve been in office for all of five minutes and have already pulled off more than most bureaucrats do in a lifetime of committee meetings and catered lunches. Operation Stork Speed? Inspired. Peter Marks? A footnote in the Conflicts of Interest and Other Losing Career Moves handbook, bless his heart. Doctors Makary and Bhattacharya? The Grey Geese of public health. Your dedication to MAHA, the work you’ve done to protect children, and your commitment to finding the root causes of autism? Nothing short of historic. From the bottom of our detoxed, glyphosate-free, seed-oil-savvy souls—thank you.

Promise? (*Also you can buy this on a magnet here.)

Now, we think it’s time to talk about the elephant in the CDC-funded room.

When are you going to pull the disastrous COVID shots off the market and call for an investigation into the nefarious politicians, pundits, philanthropaths, and powerbrokers behind them?

We’ve both read Vax-Unvax. Oh, wait. You wrote it! We’ve scoured the data, heard the whistleblowers, met the devastated families, suffered the relentless media lies, and witnessed the silencing and gaslighting of the COVID vaccine-injured. You know what’s really going on—and more importantly, we know that you know. Which makes allowing the continued pushing of these products feel a little like finding out the fire chief knows your entire neighborhood is engulfed in flames but he’s too busy rescuing kittens trapped in trees (also important!) to put it out.

From your phenomenal book, Vax-Unvax: Let the Science Speak.

You wrote this, too!

Like I said, we know you know.

With all due respect, and I do mean that sincerely: people are dying. Babies are being injected with products that you petitioned the FDA in 2021 to “revoke Emergency Use Authorizations for and refrain from approving and licensing.” Parents are being coerced. Children are being damaged and disabled. VAERS numbers are off the literal charts. Every day that these poisons remain on the market is like watching the Titanic take on water while the captain polishes the silverware.

We realize you have to be strategic. We saw what happened when you failed to freak out about the unprecedented measles outbreak that has resulted in 378 cases of the disease in 17 states this year alone. (We know you’re also trying to figure out why 251 million Americans are overweight or obese and get the toxic chemicals out of our food, but those things don’t threaten their billion-dollar COVID vaccine money machine.)

They’re watching you, Focker.

“During his confirmation hearings,” The Atlantic somberly wrote in March, “Kennedy sidestepped calls for him to declare unequivocally that vaccines do not cause autism, and appeared to convince lawmakers that he’d let Americans make their own decisions about vaccines. ‘I support the measles vaccine. I support the polio vaccine. I will do nothing as HHS secretary that makes it difficult or discourages people from taking either of those vaccines,’ Kennedy told senators. Kennedy is already breaking that promise.

We are keenly aware that you are swimming in a sea of bloodthirsty political sharks. We understand that you and you alone can’t MAHA overnight. We realize you’re up against a corrupt, pharma-funded Hydra with at least nine heads, each one with dozens of lobbyists dangling from its tendrils. (And if you’re even remotely familiar with Greek mythology, you know that if you cut off the Hydra’s head, two grow back in its place.)

But we are also positive that if anyone was put in this position—no, on this earth—to butcher that beast, it’s you. And if we’re being honest, of all of the countless amazing MAHA things we know you’re equipped to accomplish, this one right here is why we voted for you, rooted for you, rallied for you, wrote letters for you, and dropped to our knees and prayed for your appointment.

We’re not asking you to take a gentle jog toward this inferno. We’re begging for a full-on barefoot sprint through the flames. We’ve seen your shirtless push-ups. We know what you are capable of.

In case you missed the memo, millions of us have your back. And we’re not just a bunch of crunchy MAHA moms or conspiracy theorists (not that there’s anything wrong with either of those!). We’re professionals, parents, grandparents, paramedics, nurses, carpenters, scientists, dog-walkers, doctors, authors, teachers, students, retirees, and everyday health-conscious humans who are done watching loved ones and strangers suffer. We’re sick to death of hearing that COVID vaccine injuries are “rare” or “just a(nother) coincidence.” You know the truth. You’ve fearlessly and successfully fought corporate monsters in the past and inspired hope in a way few in our lifetimes have.

We’ve defended you. We fought for you. We trusted you. Please, be the man so many of us believe you to be.

You can do this.

With deep gratitude, undeniable urgency, and a tiny dose of impatience,
Jenna (a voter, patriot, parent, and person who has memorized the VAERS dashboard—and very much wishes she hadn’t had to)

You can buy books and swing by the tip jar here.