Giddy Liberals Plan Trump’s Funeral

Bruise control: “There’s a coverup at hand!”

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It’s not hyperbole: The left is obsessed with Donald Trump’s hands. They’re freakishly small. He’s inclined to throw illuminati signs with them. (Or perhaps he just can’t stop subliminally referencing vaginas; I am not making that up.) He’s been accused of mocking a disabled reporter with them and using them to perform a Nazi salute (and you thought it was just Musk). And now? Apparently they’re providing indisputable proof that the man is on death’s door.